Two years ago today we met this sweet face for the very first time. While we had been preparing for her, long before we knew who she was or even before she was born, it still did not prepare me for that actual day. That actual moment when I laid eyes on her, no longer a blurred video or a still photo, but a small, scared, living and breathing child, my heart exploded. There she was. There was our Maggie Li Ya.
It was the most beautiful, bittersweet, emotional day. We gained a daughter. She lost everything she had even known. Adoption comes from a place of deep loss. It finds beauty from the ashes. We found great beauty in Maggie, in her life and forever a part of our family. But, we will always acknowledge that this beautiful life came to us from a place of deep loss. The loss of her birth family, her country, her heritage.
Meredith Toering said it best. "Adoption. It's that beautiful and broken hallelujah.
There is no erasing the loss of what was-it is also not a replacing, the trading of one story for another.
No- adoption is the total gathering of all you were and are and who you will be. A tender holding of all the parts and pieces of the story, all the chapters that have been written and the ones yet to come.
It's that hand outstretched that grabs on and steps bravely into a story - CHOOSE that story- and says, 'with all of me and all of us, we choose all of you' and it's that little hand that reaches up to take and to trust."
We would cross the world a thousand times to get to you, Margaret Li Ya. And the fact that you trusted us, accepted us as YOUR own leaves us forever humbled.
Your nannies charged us to care and protect you, and it was a charge that we take very, very seriously. What a privilege it is to be your family!
Today, Maggie is three and thriving! She will start preschool in the fall. We are elbow deep in potty training to ensure that will happen! She will continue with her speech therapy as well.
She loves her siblings and has to do EVERYTHING they do. Everything.
She is still obsessed with Minnie Mouse.
She is our social butterfly who likes to say Hi and chat up anyone who will stop and listen to her.
She is a hugger, and will always give hugs when she leaves places. She will hug you, whether you like it or not. Luckily for Maggie, 99% of the people like her hugs! Only a few stand out little boys are not such a fan of Maggie hugs.
She loves her milk but now is completely on cups and no bottles!
She is growing and learning so much.
She is happy and silly and feisty.
Three has welcomed a whole new level of tantrums, but she will usually end them with a silly laugh and try to hug it out. Ah, the emotions of 3 year olds.
While I can still vividly remember August 7, 2017, from my waking moments to the last thing we did as we put her to bed for the first time, I have a hard time remembering what life was like before Maggie. She is so ingrained into our family and a part of who we are that it seems like we have had her forever, not just two years.
We love you so much Margaret Li Ya Fedell.
Happy 2nd Gotcha Day!
If you want to read more about Maggie's adoption and our process, you can check out the links below.
Post-Adoption:
China Posts:
Other Adoption Posts:
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